Body Snatchers
by GIrisi
Summary: A night of wild drinking leads to some thoroughly unexpected and quite unusual morning after regrets. Two wizards find themselves having a literal early life identity crisis, and must move past animosities to resolve it. SLASH
1. Good Morning, Beautiful

Harry groped blindly for his glasses, eyes hooded and encrusted with sleep as the day slowly broke

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing, only my ideas and my twisted, twisted mind.

**Authors notes:** Another firsts sort of fic. Please be kind and constructive! I will take this further if interest is apparent. Enjoy!

**Chapter One: Good morning, beautiful. **

Harry groped blindly for his glasses, eyes hooded and encrusted with sleep as the day slowly broke. Upon realizing their absence from his nightstand, he opened his eyes, squinting through the expected fuzziness to find them. Except that fuzziness never came. That was the first strange event of the morning, although not nearly as shocking or stomach curling as the dawning realization that he was in green silk sheets, in a private room in the Slytherin dormitories. Harry panicked.

The details from the night before were groggy at best- it was a rare event for the Savior of the Wizarding World to allow himself the luxury of being intoxicated, but things had happened in a swirling blur the night before, and now, somehow, he was waking up – oh, naked, too! – in a private Slytherin dorm, unaware of how exactly he had ended up here.

He perked his ears, listening for some clue as to the whereabouts of his accidental drunken tryst partner, but the showers were not running- the room was completely silent. He looked around, eyes taking in the small figurines of dragons that dotted the shelves: pewter, glass, clay- a small army of petite dragons preened, huffed, and roared tiny roars as they woke up. There sat a golden snitch in a small glass box on one of the shelves, another clue. The room was impeccable, but comfortable, and Harry slowly came to the realization that it was a blokes room.

Shaking his head, Harry rolled out of bed, stumbling to the loo. Chances were high that his lover, upon realizing he was next to a Gryffandor bloke, had fled, and there would be a mutually agreed upon silence about the incident. If it had been the first time, Harry may have been more concerned.. But part of why he avoided drinking in excess was the unfortunate habit of waking up in rooms with other men the morning after, a misfortune that caused the downfall of his short lived affair with Ginny and almost a serious rift with Ron.

Harry frowned. Something was wrong, but he couldn't quite place a finger on it. His walk wasn't quite as heavy, he felt somehow leaner and more catlike. Come to think of it, his skin was awfully soft, too. He glanced down for a moment, and at one look at that creamy white, almost translucent skin, and the shock of golden curls resting at his privates, he knew something was terribly, terribly out of place. Harry ran to the mirror.

"Malfoy!!" The roar reverberated off the tiles.

Draco awoke, eyes fuzzy, probably due to the excessive drinking the night prior. He blinked and blinked again, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, until he realized his vision was still off, and the whole room appeared to be covered by a film. What had he drunk last night, to cause such a vision change? He would make his way semi-blindly to the infirmary that morning, he decided. Through the thick fuzz of his vision, Draco was slowly able to make out his whereabouts. He was in a bunk, and his eyes were assaulted by red and gold. He was in the Gryffandor's dormitories? What had happened the night prior? Draco was scandalized, were his face seen here he would have hell to pay in the Slytherin court. He looked around, but it sounded like all of the other dorm mates were sleeping.

He wondered idly where whomever he had followed home was, or, for that matter, why he was wearing flannel pajamas that were far too large after what was apparently a drunken tryst.. in a shared dormitory? He swept his hair aside and realized it was time for a haircut, and that he sorely, sorely needed to moisturize his hands.

Draco climbed out of bed, stepping immediately into a pile of laundry, then took to squinting and peering as he attempted to navigate the maze to the loo. If he could get out of here before the others woke up, he could just act the innocent if anybody asked and pretend the incident never happened.

"Oy, Harry." Ron mumbled from the bunk above, sitting up from his slumber.

Draco froze momentarily, then darted before his red haired rival noticed him, scrambling into the loo. He noticed a shock of black hair and tan skin run by in the mirror and turned to face himself. Except that certainly, certainly was not him in the mirror. Draco shrieked, grabbing his – no, Potter's- hair in a panicked frenzy as he attempted to piece together what was going on. He heard two fast, thudding leaps and the door flung open, and a red haired mass that must have been Ron Weasley knelt beside him.

"Are you okay mate? Is it your scar? What did you see?" Ron fussed, sitting him on a stool and offering him some water while fussing over his- no, _Potter's_- scar.

"I'm fine! I'm fine! Just.. give me a second, okay?" Draco shooed Ron away, not sure what was going on, and loathe to accept care from a weasel. He closed and latched the door, starting the shower and closing his eyes to think for a moment. So, he was trapped in Harry Potter's body. How exactly this had happened, he was unsure, but he knew he had to figure out how to get out of it. Draco bit his lip for a moment. If he was in Harry Potter's body, then where was his? And where was Potter? This situation could be much, much worse, he realized, stripping off his clothes and leaping into the hot water.

There was an unusual thrill of discovery about that shower, as his soapy hands glided over a body that was very much not his, and he felt a certain level of shame about the way his rival was piquing his interest. A fleeting thought passed through his mind _perhaps when this is all dealt with, I will try to be a bit more friendly with Potter. _He closed his minds to those thoughts and focused on the mechanical actions of bathing.

Potter completely lacked all important grooming products, and after his shower Draco was disappointed to not have his extensive skincare products available, and felt wildly uncomfortable with going out in public with wild hair. _Except you're not going out in public, Harry Potter is, and Harry Potter never has neat hair_ Draco reminded himself. Regardless, he smoothed his hair back and combed it as neatly as he could manage. He stumbled back out into the common room where the dorm mates were all rising, wondering where those blasted glasses were.

"Uh, Ron, do you know where I put my glasses?" Draco forced himself to avoid all snide comments and teasing jests for the moment and use Potter's allies. Ron pointed at his nightstand and Draco followed the line of his arm to that surface, groping until he found the metal and glass frames, and put them on.

Draco was wildly uncomfortable in this setting and situation, but if there was one thing he could do, it was act. He had sat through enough meetings and dinners he didn't really care about to learn how to adapt to other's expectations- there was no way he could fool Ron or Hermione, but he would avoid telling them until he was able to find his body and sort out what was going on.

Harry stormed through Hogwarts. It had taken him nearly half an hour to navigate through Malfoy's extensive wardrobe, but he had finally found a somewhat casual looking green tee shirt with a silver snake on it and black jeans. He had the inkling feeling the prat wouldn't appreciate his appearing in public while wearing such casual clothes, or with such wild hair (he had seen the various hair salves, but chosen to ignore them), but his top priority was finding Ron and Hermione and sorting this situation out.

"Sparkling Hippogryph" Harry spoke to the fat lady.

"Mr. Malfoy, that is yesterday's password." The fat lady admonished him.

"I'm Harry Potter!" Harry pleaded.

"Very clever Mr. Malfoy, Mr. Potter and his friends have already left for breakfast if you would like a word with him." She turned away then, effectively ending the conversation.

Harry fumed. He hadn't thought that people might not believe him, and that it may take further convincing than just claiming to be himself. He made his way to the Great Hall, immediately storming towards the Gryffandor table. He saw himself there at breakfast, laughing pleasantly with his friends. His hair was too neat, his manners almost impeccable, and was he wearing?

Draco felt wildly uncomfortable. He had managed to find Harry's only button down shirt and was wearing that with jeans. As soon as he arrived in the common room, Hermione had launched into a lecture about the woes of partying excessively the night before a potions test, and dragged him off to the Great Hall for breakfast. He claimed to have a headache when asked, giving him time to figure out how to behave, and excuse for "not acting like himself."

Breakfast eating was almost a disaster, and would have blown his cover if he hadn't excused himself to the restroom long enough for Hermione to fill his plate. He attempted to mimic Ron's eating habits, which, in combination with his impeccable manners, did not turn out very well, and had a great deal of trouble forcing the meat and egg breakfast down his throat when he was used to fruit and cream in the morning.

He was just getting into the groove of pretending to be Potter when he realized a very angry, very rumpled looking Draco Malfoy stalking across the hall. He turned smoothly in his seat, standing up at the last moment to face himself.

Harry huffed.

"How very Gryffandor of you to come charging at me like this, Malfoy," Draco spoke, with a light tease in his voice, "I thought perhaps we could settle our differences in a more civil manner this time, perhaps you would join me for tea and conversation before the potions exam?"

Harry deflated, disarmed. He had expected barbs, an argument, or something other than for Malfoy to invite him to tea. Ron and Hermione were looking at him with great suspicion, and he realized Draco had won them over in his body temporarily with smooth talking. Any argument that ensued now would not end well for him.

"Fine. 7th floor, by Barnabus. _Potter_."


	2. Communication and Classwork

Disclaimer:

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing in the Potterverse!

**Authors Notes: **I'm beginning to struggle with where I'm going on this, fic writing is far more difficult than I had anticipated! Please let me know if they are behaving OOC, I am trying hard to keep them in character. Also, most of this chapter was influenced by the tango music I was listening to, I was picturing their conversation as almost a tango-like exchange. Thank you for the nice reviews!

**Chapter Two: Communication and Classwork**

Harry wanted to pace, very badly. His foot twitched, but the movement was not natural to this body, so he stopped it and stood still. If Malfoy had the decency to attempt to behave naturally until they sorted this out, it was the least he could do to attempt to do the same. So he leaned against a balcony, painting a slight sneer on his face that hardened whenever some passing student tried to engage him in a conversation.

Within a few moments, he noticed an awkward black haired shape lumbering up the stairs. _Surely I don't look like that?_ Harry grimaced. Draco was walking as if he had two left feet, alternating between attempted graceful movements and then seeming to remember that the body he was inhabiting was not quite built the same as his own, face perpetually caught between the start of a snarl and a meager attempt at a pleasant smile.

"Hello, Potter." He saved his jibes and began to pace in front of the tapestry on the wall,_ I need somewhere private to talk, I need somewhere private to talk… _

Momentarily, the pale boy in front of him grabbed the door handle, and with a pointed look at Draco and a tossing of his head, indicated for him to follow.

The room had responded to Harry's needs by providing them with a comfortable den-like setting, with dark wood and neutral colors, a pair of plush walls, and a cheerily crackling fireplace.

Harry shut the door and turned to face his body.

"Expelliarmus! Mobilicorpus!" And Draco suddenly found himself dangling by his ankle, head dangerously close to the ground, and watched his- or, rather, Potter's- wand fly across the room into the seeker's waiting hand. The moment it touched his hand, a series of gold and red sparks flew from it's tip. Harry nodded to himself, tucking Draco's wand back into his pocket and pointing his own wand at the helpless figure in front of him.

"Potter! What the hell?" He indignantly huffed, struggling to keep his glasses on his face as they threatened to slip over his forehead. For a moment he was terrified about this vulnerability.. But Potter with his Gryffandor sensibilities was unlikely to harm a helpless victim, and even less likely to do any serious damage to what was originally his body. A fire burned behind his eyes, the likes of which Draco had never seen, even after particularly venomous taunt exchanges. He realized at that moment that there was something to Harry Potter beyond what he had initially understood, and the strength that hid within the spirit of the wizard destined to save their world.

"Malfoy, what have you done?" Harry snarled. The boy was angry. "If you think you can use this… change… to gain an upper hand with Voldemort.."

Draco stiffened, stopping his struggling, and looked sternly at Harry. A moment prior he had thought Potter's actions to be excessive and suspicious, forgetting that they were at war.

"Potter, I did not do this. And I don't support the Dark Lord as feverently as you seem to think I do! I swear to you on both of these… You can ask me under vertiserum if you would like to," Draco flinched at this offer, _I can't fix this alone, he has to trust me so we can work together and figure out what happened.._

Harry watched as his body pleaded with him, face set in grim determination, ready to catch some ill intent. It had been a stressful day from the moment he'd woken up in the wrong body, but come to learn quickly that Mafoy's reputation was a very useful shield- all he needed to do to avoid questions was scowl fiercely and give people glares if they came too close to him. He looked on with a cool stillness that was not unfamiliar to this body, admiring how quickly Malfoy's body was able to adapt to his favored physical expressions.

Abruptly, he ended mobilicorpus, levitating Draco into a chair. With a thought, the room produced two cups of tea and a very small vial. Briskly, he tipped three drops out of the vial into Draco's tea cup, setting the vial down on the table. Draco lifted his tea cup with one hand, reaching towards the vial with the other. He carefully uncorked it with Harry's limber fingers, cocking his eyebrow at the familiar pale face across from him.

"I have no reason to trust you, either, Potter."

Harry paused, lifted his teacup, and nodded. "You first."

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Half an hour later, the unlikely pair in the room of requirement had reached a forced truce of sorts. Believing in one another's lack of ill intentions and shared shock and disappointment at the body swap, the conversation quickly shifted gears.

"Potter, you're pants at potions! I cannot have a poor grade on today's exam!"

"Shit, there is a DADA practical exam today as well. We're demonstrating dueling in pairs. I certainly can't do poorly on that."

They sat, wondering how to handle the immediate problems revolving around classes and social interactions. Harry knew at some point, if they didn't find a solution quickly, they'd have to figure out how to handle the larger issues- namely the possibility of an Order of the Phoenix meeting. They had mutually agreed to keep silent about their predicament, each citing a surface fear of social implications as a reason for silence. Each player, of course, had several underlying reasons for keeping silent about the body swap situation, but neither party wished to talk, and they swore to silence for social propriety alone.

"Partner with me."

"What?" Harry snapped out of his trance, ruminating on the past half hour of conversation to catch Malfoy's quietly suggested solution.

"Partner with me. We work in pairs in Potions, as well as in DADA. If we work together, we can cover for each other's ineptitudes."

Harry turned this idea over in his head. "Fine. And our friends?"

Draco smirked, an unusually calculating expression that took Harry by surprise when it graced the features of the face he'd come to know as his own. "I've got being a prat wonder boy down, no problems. Your friends are certainly quite unobservant, not too surprising, with their breeding.." Harry's eyes narrowed.

"Malfoy. Remember also who is representing you to your Slytherin buddies. My, it would be unfortunate if the Ice Princess of Slytherin were to, hmm, grow soft? If you want respect for your body, you had better damn well respect mine."

Draco grumbled something almost akin to a forced apology.

"Okay, we can both do what we're best at for a few days," Draco looked up at Harry's furrowed brow and wild blonde hair, "bicker with one another, and be insufferable prats that want to be left alone." Draco pursed his lips as Harry ran his hands through his hair, again, "But you really need to learn how to dress. I can't go out in public the way you've been representing me, it's disgraceful. I will arrive in my rooms promptly tomorrow morning to instruct you into more suitable clothes."

Harry snorted, holding back a laugh. They were trapped in each other's bodies, worried about mannerisms, class grades, and large scale implications, _and all Draco can think about is his damn wardrobe? _Harry quickly corrected himself. _Malfoy. Malfoy, not Draco._

"Fine. And I assume you will begin brewing polyjuice potion immediately? Look, I'll act suspicious for a few days, and Hermione and Ron should be easily convinced that you need it to investigate my activities. They'll help." Harry choked for a second on the sensation of guilt for keeping his best friends out of the loop, at least for now. _We agreed to keep it a secret… But they'll probably figure out something is up, or perhaps I can convince Malfoy to tell them after a few days of this. _

He abruptly stood up, noticing the time. "Time for potions, Malfoy. Oh, before I forget, your wand?" Draco hesitantly held his wand out to Harry, who cast a glamour on it, before repeating the process on his own wand. "Our wands seem to be attuned to our magical signature, not our biological signature.. But it would look awfully strange if we suddenly swapped wands, yes?" Grey eyes fixed on cool emerald ones, and with a nod and a quick toss of his unruly black hair, Draco stepped out of the room and headed back towards the Gryffandor rooms to freshen up before class.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Draco had not anticipated being accosted by a pair of unruly redheads on his way into the Gryffandor common room.

"Oi Harry mate! We have something we have to show you!" They each grabbed one of his arms, dragging him across the room to a small dish of green and silver candies, each one decorated with a beautiful S.

"I have a potions exam to get to! I can't do this right now." Draco protested, nonetheless curious about what the weasels were doing with a dishful of Slytherin candies.

"Yes, yes, we know, but look!" In unison, they each popped a candy into their mouth, a temporary blissful look crossing their faces as they appreciated the fine quality of the candies themselves. After a moment, Draco noticed something strange happening to them… Indeed, their red hair was becoming- redder?- if that was even possible, and slowly gaining gold streaks. Their eyebrows suddenly retracted and sprouted back a gleaming gold color, and their robes took on red and gold hues that treaded the line between magnificent and garish. Transformation complete, they stood in the middle of the common room looking like nothing less than two gods of Gryffandor to rival Godric himself. Several students looked on approvingly, nodding at their display of house pride.

"That's swell and all, but what does this have to do with me? And why are the candies colored like that?" Draco asked, a sneaking suspicion that he wouldn't like the answer.

"We sped up the results, Harry. Normally these results take 10 hours to produce… All we'll say for now is… Be sure to look over at the Slytherin table tomorrow morning. Now, hurry along Harry, good luck on your exam, and don't let you-know-who distract you too much!" They wriggled their bushy golden eyebrows in unison before disappearing in a puff of smoke and wild cackle.

Draco stared after them for a moment, wondering how You-Know-Who would be distracting Harry during a Potions Exam, or for that matter why the words were punctuated with a suggestive eyebrow wriggle. He surmised that the twins must have been talking about a different you-know-who. He felt a moments pang of guilt for not being able to stop the incoming shame for his house, but alas, the twins had taken the candy, _and it's not as if any of them will listen to me if I try to warn them.._

It was at that moment he realized his tardiness and ran to the potions dungeons at top speed, robes flailing behind him.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

_Where is he?_ Harry fidgeted, nervous for the state of his potions grade if Draco decided not to show up for class. Everybody had already partnered off for the exam, but using his carefully applied sneer, Harry had managed to procure a lab workstation alone, being the odd one out in the class.

"If you are all ready, we will begin the –" Snape was cut short as the door slammed open, revealing a disheveled, huffing and puffing Harry Potter.

"Why, thank you for gracing us with your presence Mr. Potter! 15 points from Gryffandor for extreme tardiness! Oh but look, Potter, there is some good news for you, it seems Mr. Malfoy has saved a workspace just for you." Snape snapped.

Blushing and apologizing, Draco slinked across the room to take up position next to Harry. Harry sneered at him. "Off saving the world again, Golden Boy?"

"Ah, I see that wand is still lodged up your arse, Malfoy."

"BOYS! 5 points from each of your houses for disrupting the exam!" Snape effectively ended their budding verbal spar by launching into a description of what the exam would cover.

Draco was surprised to feel a slip of paper fly into his hands. He looked around for a moment before realizing the attentive smirk on the face of his blonde lab partner as he quietly set down his quill.

_And is that something your body enjoys, Malfoy?_ Draco read the note once, choked, read it again, and flushed brilliantly as he quietly incinerated the note. _Fuck you, Potter, _he itched to reply, but the exam had started, and already pale hands were urging him towards the ingredients cabinet.


End file.
